Monday, November 17, 2008


Here at Casa de Hinnant we only use our mobile phones for communication. We have no landline. In a house this small we don't need a landline since we can hear our mobiles ringing no matter where we are.

I used to have a flip-phone. Two years ago when I first got it, it was cool. It took pictures, I could text, it fit in my pocket, AND, best of all, it entertained my daughter.

Emmie could lay in my lap pushing the buttons, opening and closing it, listening to the beeps, for 30 minutes at a time. She was fascinated. If she was cranky in the car I was all here! Take my phone! And she did. It became hers. If you refused her the phone or took it away from her, or, heaven help you, gave it to her BROTHER to play with she became demented with denial. She would try to take it from me when I talked on it. Whenever I closed it after a conversation she would repeat "Bye" and reach for it. Yeah, cute the first 5 times and then, just annoying.

And one day I noticed the top half was a little loose. And then, a tiny, miniscule piece of plastic was missing from one of the hinges. And then, this.


Off I went to the cellphone store for help. What? They said. No insurance? Two months shy of being eligible an upgrade? Bwahahahaha you shall pay full RETAIL for a new phone! I was furious. Incensed. I caused a scene and got my righteous indignation on and then I paid full retail for a new phone. And bought insurance.

But what a shiny, priddy new phone it was! What wonderful new things it would do! Oh touchscreen LG how I love you! There was a new rule in the house - nobody under the age of 18 gets to touch Mommy's new phone - and God love her, when Emmie sees my phone lying somewhere within her reach she picks it up and HANDS IT TO ME as though to say See mommy? I'm not touching your phone I'm just reminding you to KEEP IT AWAY FROM ME.

Then disaster struck. I was cleaning the toilet yesterday and I totally forgot I put my phone in the pocket of my shirt. As I leaned over to scrub I saw a sploosh and there was my lovely phone lying at the bottom of the toilet. And not only was it in the toilet but it was STUCK in the little groove at the bottom. I scrambled to pull it out but I couldn't get my fingers around it. I fumbled and grabbed and used both hands to leverage it but it was too slippery and I began to hyperventilate. Desperation gave way to sadness as I realized that even if I got the phone out of the stupid john it would be ruined. Finally, I got my fingers underneath it and pulled it out. The screen was blank.

The lady at the phone store said there was still hope and told me to take it all apart and leave it covered in uncooked white rice for a day or so. The rice pulls the moisture out and once dried, it may power up again.

It does, but everything is upside down. The numbers, the letters, all upside down and backwards. It's the strangest thing.

The company is sending me another one and I have a loaner until it arrives. A very basic, simple phone, which is probably all that I really deserve at this point. And did I mention that I blamed the whole thing on Emmie when I made the insurance claim? Much less embarrassing.


Anonymous said...

Ugh... At least you had insurance this time.

Dana said...

How hilarious! I mean, I'm sure you didn't think so at the time, but, er, I couldn't help laughing. ;)

Avi loves all things telephone. I refuse to let her play with my 1st-cell-phone-at-30 and so am planning her Christmas around this obsession.